You are logged out. Click here to login.
« Design Flaw |
Main
| In A World... »
July 31, 2006
LAW OF DOG OWNERSHIP #4
Law of Dog Ownership #4: Given a choice between two potential poo locations, your dog will always choose the one with the higher Poo Inconvenience Score (PIS).
Poo Inconvenience Scores:
- Well-Kept Lawn: 2pts
- Neighbor's Well-Kept Lawn: 3pts
- Church Lawn: 5pts
- Lawn With a "No Dogs" Sign: 6pts
- Church Lawn With a "No Dogs" Sign: 10pts
- Area In Front of a Nice Restaurant: 5pts
- Area In Front of a Nice Restaurant With Outdoor Seating Area: 7pts
- Area In Front of a Nice Restaurant With Full Outdoor Seating Area: 10pts
In the event of a tie, preference is given to the location that gives the greatest number of casual observers the best view of the pooing. So, if the dog were to have to choose between a Church Lawn With a "No Dogs" sign and an Area In Front of a Nice Restaurant With Full Outdoor Seating Area (both 10 points), the dog would choose the restaurant, and if possible, angle himself such that his rear end is facing the restaurant full of shocked people.
Corollary: If the dog walker does not have a poop bag on hand, any location will do.
Enzo had a good weekend.
[01:52 PM]
+++++
Oh MAN.... that sucks!! :P
So, last weekend I decided to get clip-in pedals and shoes for my road bike, and took them out for a spin right away because I was excited to see how long it would take before I'd fell over. (Fortunately, I didn't.) So I rode to this park and decided that I needed to adjust the tension in my pedals, so I walked onto my grass to make the adjustments. Then I went home and took my shoes off thinking, "Crap! I got all this mud in my cleats!" So I started cleaning them with a paper towel and then realized that it wasn't quite the right shade of brown...so then I tentatively sniffed it....and it was DOG POO!! Freshly soft dog poop, warmed by the hot sun, mashed into every crevice of my brand new cleated shoes. "Crap!" indeed! :P
Thank you for picking up after Enzo's poo, even when it's right in front of a full outdoor seating area. ;)
|
